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Tuesday, 24 March 2015

Awesome Desi Funny Punjabi WhatsApp & Facebook Status Updates

2G-3G-and-22G-Punjabi-Facebook-Timeline-Profile-Cover[4]

  • Kad aayegi online Tu Kudiyee... Mein Chat Box to na naZra hatava..
    ni saara din facebook te... tere page te gediyaan laava.. ♥ !!
  • Tenuu chak lena bAbA rAmdEv vangu .,,
    J tu jada att chuki :p. ;)

  • Yar russe tan RAB russe,
    Yar fir russe tan DIL tute,
    Yar fir russe tah JAG shute,
    Yar fir russe tah?? maro sale de roz da he kam aa :P ;)

  • jhUthE mUho nA kEhnDi diL viCh haAn teRe,,
    haAn j tU kRe krA jiNdaGi maiN nAam tEre :D. ;)

  • ohNu pauN Lyi maI RAbB NaL V ladH LAiNda....
    Par...FeR maI SOcHyA K REsuLt da tYm a...rAb Nal panGA LAIna theEK NAI.. :P :D

  • TeRe nAAlo taaN saADa "ANTIVIRUS" cHaNGa...
    JeHda sAadi CaRe taaN kARdA :p :)

  • JiNi mArJi cHaTtiNg KaRLo
    SetTiNg tAaN rAb nE Hi kRauNi aE :p ;

  • Kash oh jaan mang lendi tan asi de deni c has ke. . .
    .
    par chandri ne . . . ?
    .
    facebook acc. da PASSWORD mang leya . . :p ;)

  • tERa pyAAr 500 de nOte vaRga ,, dArr lAgDa DUPLICATE na hOve :P ;)

  • pEhlaA tu laGgI mAinNu HoOr pArI c ......... HunN taA cHanGgI laGgE DuuR khAdI Hi ........

  • KaAsH koI sAnNu PETroL de RaTe wAaNG pYAar kaRe ... JeHdA waDhDaA hi jaAve .....

  • Oh pyaar ch jaan mangdi c....
    kamliiee...
    .Asi ta jawaak nu toffee de k ni raaji.........:P

  • i20 viCh beH kE keHNDi i20 wALAa yAaR aW.........
    ENDeAvouR viCH beH kE keHNdi i20 v kOI cAr Aw............:D

  • Huthyaar taa chadhte tere kainn teh...
    Parr dekkhii dhokhaa naaa devii,.... CHALAANEE HAJJEE V NI BHULYAA......

  • ni torh shor kaddh assi aayie tere piche aivei thakk gaye maar-2 gerhiyaa......

    sunn le tuh gall saddi kaddh de koi hall,,, tennu sadde toh shikataan dass kehdiyaa.....

  • ThOdA TiMe tU V kAd yAaRa nU De tU JhAtT...HoVe tErA GuD LuCk Je KaRa MaIn tAiNu f***....

  • DiNe MaShOoK LaD Di .... rAt Nu sAla maChar LaD Da

  • Wich laayi ae photo ohnu dekhi jande haan..Ik tere karke phone nu matha teki jande haan.!!!!!!!!!

  • Dine chain na aave,
    raati neend na aave.
    Mai rab nu puchea,
    rabba ki ehi pyar hai.
    Rab kehnda oh soja chup kr ke,
    garmi naal sarre passe ehi haal hai...........!! :D

  • jinna PaISA unna gooda pyaar kardia ne ,,,
    apnia jeba ehe rakhn BLaNK ,, aish mundeya de siraan utte kardia ne ....

  • Tere layi peg te peg banwa denda,
    Tere layi Royal Stag de tabb bharwa denda,
    kambaqth tusi taan pende nahi,
    nahi taan Tajmahal nu ve theka banwa denda :D

  • JITHO TAK SOHNIYE NI PAUNCH TERE VEERAN DI......OHTO FOOT AGGE PAINDA PARCHAWAN TERE YAAR DA.......

  • ‎""nI tU P.T.C neWz Vargi a bs gaPPaan cHaddi ReHnI a...!! :P

  • Main busy aan study vich sohniya.........tu varo var kehan lag gi..................Pehla pat ke begana putt sohniye.....tu "offline" rehn lag payi !!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • DOLI VICHON HEER VAJAAN MARDI RANJHE NU,,, KEHNDI GHR JA KE FACEBOOK CHECK KAR LYE ..VIAH VALIYA PHOTAN PAYIAN NE.

  • PyAr MeRa PaHuNcH GaYa AeHo JE MuKaAm tE .....
    ShUrU tErE naAm Te.. KhAtAm TeRe NaAm tE......

  • tAiNu aPnA BnAiYe AsI EnE JoGe kItHe..
    HaAl dIl dA SuNaIyE AsI EnE JoGe kItHe..
    TiNu yAaD KaRnA Hi jInDaGi hAi sAdI..
    YaAd aSi tAiNu aIyE aSi eNE JoGe kItHe....

  • Ni mAiN PyAr cH ShReEf lAdAi wIcH GuNdA... MeRi aAnKhA ViCh aNkHa pAkE DeKhDa nI MuNdA....

  • DOLI VICHON HEER VAJAAN MARDI RANJHE NU,,, KEHNDI GHR JA KE FACEBOOK CHECK KAR LYE ..VIAH VALIYA PHOTAN PAYIAN NE.

  • ni tu meri RED BULL ni,tainu dekh dekh ENERGY aoundi.......

  • JeDe kEnDe cC , sI TaInU DIL dE CORNER vIcH LoCk kAr DiTa ,AaJ UnA Ne hI sAnU FACEBOOK Te BLOCK KaR DiTa......

  • Levis diyan Jeana tu paun lag pyi,
    Rbk de shoes chmkaun lag pyi,
    Beer chad Wine pee k standard vadon lag pyi,
    ......
    Saheliyan naal ghumdi SamJe tu Jive Janab ho gyi,
    Ta hi tere ghar de kehnde......
    jatta de munde
    naal reh ke saadi kudi kharab ho gyi __!!!!buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrr​rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr​rrrr

  • ni ShIkArI tainu kdo da bja ke lai jave........na mainu kise naddo kha da dar kahve.......bas drda dil ik gal ton ........eh tan pichle mahine meri c koi eh na a ke keh jave................

  • MaInU PyAr tErE NaAl tErE UtTe jInD WaR Da...JeDa vEkHe tErE WaL OdE SiNe gAlI MaR Da....

  • chaan chandni ratt mehrma......tim timonde tarre .....facbook te aa ja sohniya so gaye ghr de sarre

  • JaDO PeNDa KiSE NaaL ' VaiR '__
    Fer NiKLE ' DUNaLLI ' VicHO FaaR__
    Ohdo Kh00N ' SADA ' AGG WaNG KhoLDA__
    BaS ik WaaR BoLDI ' DuNALLI ' duJI Vaar JuDGE BolDA.....

  • soni fasdi ni,maddi fasauni ni,line badi lambi aa:vari auni ni:::::::::::::::::

  • PuRa hAth mErA ViCh sArKaR De... LaL BaTi tAiYo LaGi uTE cAr dE...

  • tOmMy DiYa sHiRtAn.........JeEnAA PePe DiYa PaUnDe HaNn..........
    << PuNtO >> gAdDi ViCh GedE tErE pIcHe LaUnDe HanN............:)...;)

  • ni sonie tere chaeni chhalle ..... sone tere suit kude .... jinne vich tu saari sajdi .... onne de mere boot kude. haha!!!

  • jatt bullet te ... bullet 100 te ... hunb dass beeba pichche behna .. ya thalle auna !!!

  • pHoTo Ka Di La LaYe MaI _______fAcEbOoK______tE eVeN seNtY hOyYeEeE FiRrEeE mErI FuNkY LoOk tE........!!!!!!!!!

  • akkh chadi te muchch khadi ... tohar anokhi sarkaar di ..vekkhi scenty na hoji mutiyare .. vekh akkh velli yaar di ..

  • hUn Mai sHReEf Ho gEyA a,iK SohNi MutIyAr de Dil DE KaReEb Ho GeyA
    a,oHdE kOl mErE DiL dE ChaBi,OhMeRi AkhRI MasHoOk tE TuhADI 10vI BhAbi

  • gore tann te duppatya di chhaa krke ... tainu chhadanga main bachya di maa krke !

  • nI BUlIaN GuLaBi TeRiYaN___gAlLan tE lAlLI cHaIyI hOyE AaW..........Ni JeDi ChEeJ dA Tu MaNn kRdI........oH mItTrAn Ne 36 VaRr VaJaIyE hOYe aW_____

  • KiVeN kRaa MaI pYAAr dA iKrAAr
    MaI mUnDa AwAArA
    Tu sOhNi MuTiyAAr
    TU mErE NaaL JaaN Nu TaIyaR
    TeRa Baapu PoLiCe Nu BuLoUn nU tAIyAr

  • mOdDe uTtE rAfAl DoNaLi ....RaKhI jAtT nE zIpSy KaLlI....
    vIcH tApE cHamKiLE dI lAgAi BaLiYe Ni ....JAgGe jAtT vAnGu YaRrAn Di ChAdAi BaLiYe Ni JaGgE JaTt vAnGu.........

  • KaAsH koI sAnNu PETroL de RaTe wAaNG pYAar kaRe ... JeHdA waDhDaA hi jaAve ......

  • Oh pyaar ch jaan mangdi c....
    kamliiee...
    Asi ta jawaak nu toffee de k ni raaji.........:P

  • i20 viCh beH kE keHNDi i20 wALAa yAaR aW.........
    ENDeAvouR viCH beH kE keHNdi i20 v kOI cAr Aw............:D

  • SadDi jAAn Te bAnN aAunDi a.........
    JaDoOn kiSe hoR nU 'TAKE CARE' keH jaAnadi a............

  • Government nu ekk nwa kanoon bnauna chahida,,,
    Tenu vekhan da hakk bss mainu hona chahida..!!

  • Sadi kismat de sitare hale dhundle ne :(:(
    rabb ne dite je chamka fer tenu dasangee ... !!

  • Cheeja Varti diyaa chote.... YaaaaR ni Varti de... !!

  • Jaan chahidi te has ke tu mang lyiii ... zada chusti chalaki wali lorh na...

  • Khud Khushi Karna Buzdili Hai Janab,
    Agar Marna Hi Hai to Ishq Kar Lo !!

  • Muk gayi degree yaar par jigri baithe dil vich rabb banke... :P

  • Loki 4-4 Kuria Set kari Firde Ne . . . Satho tha Saali Zindagi Ni Set Ho Rei . . !!

    .ohnu shakk a ki mai ohde lyi jaan nai de skda.~.______________.~.mainu khauf a 'oh rovegi boht mainu ajmaun to baad......

  • Hor gallan tenu bdiyan aundia "I LOVE YOU" kEhn Lagge kyU daRdi Ae ,,
    jiUndi rHe teri chOti bhEn pyAri maiNu nit mSgs te"JIJU JIJU"
    kaRdi Ae !! :P :P

  • Har Pal Vakhre Hi Rang Hunde Raan de......Aakhar Nu Kehndian Ne Maape Naio Mande...

  • Dine chain na aave,
    raati neend na aave.
    Mai rab nu puchea,
    rabba ki ehi pyar hai.
    Rab kehnda oh soja chup kr ke,
    garmi naal sarre passe ehi haal hai...........!! :D


  • Wich laayi ae photo ohnu dekhi jande haan..Ik tere karke phone nu matha teki jande haan.!!!!!!!!!


  • Chaan Badlaan Ch Kho geya Ae...NI tym Peg Da V Ho gya Ae...;)


  • Dunyia ch lagda na jee...jind jive jail di salakhan....

  •  


  • BaHutI nA shaukiNI lAyA kaR sohNiYe!!!!!!aiwEN kiSI Na kisI nU mAR ChadENGe:!!!!!!!!!??????•••

Chete Kareya | Manjit Sahota | Feat. Bunty Bains & Desi Crew | Mp3 Song Download

Click to Share on Facebook - http://bit.ly/CheteKareya_FullVideo
Song - Chete Kareya
Singer - Manjit Sahota
Lyrics - Bunty Bains
Music - Desi Crew
Label - Mp4 Records
Produced by - DS Waraich , Harkaran Singh
D.O.P - Ashwani Thapar
Photography - HD Creations
Directed by - PEJIMIA
POST PRODUCTION - Hammy Kahlon
PULICITY DESIGN - Pankaj Sharma

DOWNLOAD MP3

Narma | Jenny Johal | Feat. Bunty Bains & Desi Crew | Mp3 Song Download

Song :- Narma,
Singer :- Jenny Johal,
Lyrics & Conceived :- Bunty Bains,
Music :- Desi Crew,
Video - Jashan Nanarh
Label :- Speed Records

DOWNLOAD MP3

Thursday, 19 March 2015

Youngster Returns | Jassi Gill & Babbal Rai | Mp3 Song Download

 

Youngster Returns
Artist - Jassi Gill & Babbal Rai
Lyrics - Happy Raikoti
Music - Jatinder Shah
Video - Sukh Sanghera
Label - Speed Records

 

320Kbps
DOWNLOAD MP3

One Bottle Down| Yo Yo Honey Singh | Mp3 Song Download |320 Kbps

SONG: ONE BOTTLE DOWN
SINGER: YO YO HONEY SINGH
COMPOSED BY : YO YO HONEY SINGH
LYRICS: LIL GOLU, YO YO HONEY SINGH
VIDEO: DIRECTORGIFTY
Publicity & Design - RDM Goldstar
MIXED and MASTERED BY - VINOD VERMA
MUSIC ON :T -SERIES

Set it as your caller tune -
One Bottle Down
http://bit.ly/1F2GUj7
One Bottle Down - Rap - Haa Nashe Mein Hai Chur http://bit.ly/1H1uBEp
One Bottle Down - Monday To Sunday http://bit.ly/1Evu89Z
One Bottle Down - One Bottle Down With Rap http://bit.ly/19z7YcU

DOWNLOAD MP3

Wednesday, 18 March 2015

101 Funny and Hilarious Whats App & Facebook Status Updates

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  • Decided to burn lots of calories today so I set a fat kid on fire!
  • One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and too stubborn to ask for directions.
  • When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume it’s for them?
  • I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.

  • sometimes, not remembering may be the better.
  • X says my computer just beat me at chess…but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
  • X is color blind and trying to solve a rubies cube… This could take a while.
  • X is the girl next door…if you live next door to a whore house.
  • What is fat, ginger and pregnant? Nothing..
  • slept like a baby last night…. Waking up every 3 hours crying for food.
  • wanted to kill the sexiest person alive…But suicide’s a crime.
  • X is proud of herself. She finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said 2-4 years.
  • People say that love is in every corner……gosh! maybe I'm moving in circles..
  • Why is a newspaper ten times more interesting when somebody across the table is reading it?
  • Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
  • WARNING: Objects in mirror are fatter than they appear.
  • ║▌║█║▌║▌││║▌║█║▌│║ *ZAP* *BEEP* Price: $7.95
  • Dear Santa, let me explain…
  • I think my girlfriend has had sixty-one boyfriends before me. She calls me her sixty second lover.
  • My wife said I’m too immature and if I don’t grow up it’s going to erect a barrier between us. Ha ha ha, erect.
  • If guys had periods, they’d brag about the size of their tampons.
  • Make love, not war. Hell, do both. Get married. Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
  • Statistically, 132% of all people exaggerate.
  • Statistically 5/4 of people have trouble with fractions.
  • ٩(•̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃-̃)۶ ٩(●̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃•̃)۶
  • _̴ı̴̴̡̡̡ ̡͌l̡̡̡ ̡͌l̡*̡̡ ̴̡ı̴̴̡ ̡̡͡|̲̲̲͡͡͡ ̲▫̲͡ ̲̲̲͡͡π̲̲͡͡ ̲̲͡▫̲̲͡͡ ̲|̡̡̡ ̡ ̴̡ı̴̡̡ ̡͌l̡̡̡
  • if only life came with a ◄◄ REW ► PLAY ▌▌PAUSE █▌STOP
  • scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal today’s status.
  • ̿̿̿ ̿’ ̿’̵͇̿̿з=(•̪●)=ε/̵͇̿̿/’̿’̿ ̿ this is a stick-up… give me ALL yo [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅1̲̅)̲̅$̲̅]!
  • Some people come into our lives & leave footprints on our hearts. Others come into our lives & make us wanna leave footprints on their face.
  • The only place you find success before work is in the dictionary.
  • Boys are like baby diapers when they get to be filled with shit they are thrown to be replaced.
  • I've yet to meet a woman who got pregnant from swallowing.

  • Cut here —————–✄———————-
  • Me and my wife are inseparable. Sometimes, it takes three or four people to pull us apart.
  • I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.
  • People who write diet books live off the fat of the land.
  • Dance like no one’s going to put it on YouTube.
  • Doctors waiting room needs some music. And better lighting. And more women. And a pole in the middle of the room. And a buffet.
  • Best Friends Listen to what you don't say.
  • Just wanted to let you know that you are my BFBFF… Best Facebook Friend Forever..
  • So many stupid people, and so few asteroids.
  • X thinks that Facebook is the compost heap for my brain.
  • Yes, I know how to shut up. I just don’t know when.
  • You miss 100 percent of the shots u never take.
  • Me and the gummy bears have a plot to rule the world but shhhhh its a secret.
  • I use to be great at wordplay. Once a pun a time.
  • Sometimes? Late at night? I rearrange traffic signs. People need to be challenged.
  • I guess if you spoke your mind, you’d be speechless, huh?
  • X thinks that 100-calorie packs have just enough cookies to piss me off!!
  • Alcohol does NOT make you fat…it makes you lean…against tables,chairs,walls, floors and ….Ugly people!!!
  • what has two ears and cant hear? —————–.> GRANDPA
  • I’m not a racer….But i can fly.

  • press the star below and watch it glow
  • ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ click star then up arrow to left to reveal status.
  • I thinks my neighbor just caught me stealing his Wi-Fi internet.
  • Teaching your own mother how to use Facebook is like willingly signing your own death warrant.
  • X is wondering why Facebook bothers to give the option of “liking” my own comment? Of course I like my own comments. I’m awesome..
  • Every day, man is making bigger and better fool-proof things, and every day, nature is making bigger and better fools. So far, I think nature is winning.
  • I swear my pillow could be a hairstylist I always wake up with the weirdest hairdos.
  • X just received a coupon in the mail: Buy one sock, get one FREE! While socks last.
  • X believes that if you tell your boss what you really think of him, the truth will set you free.
  • ¡ǝɯıʇ ǝɯɐs ǝɥʇ ʇɐ ʞooqǝɔɐɟ ǝsn puɐ puɐʇspuɐɥ ɐ op ʎןןɐuıɟ uɐɔ
  • Smile, it’s the second best thing you can do with your lips.
  • oh I’m sorry! i didn’t realize you were giving me a dirty look…i just thought you were ugly like that all the time!!
  • wants to merge MySpace, Facebook, YouTube and Twitter and call it: MY FACE YOU TWIT.
  • X says don’t look at me in that tone of voice.
  • Is anyone going to put anything funny on here?????
  • If women ruled the world there would be no wars. Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other.
  • eat eat and eat….but don’t eat my brain.
  • I married my wife for her looks. But not the ones she’s been giving me lately!
  • a guy knocked on my door today asking for a donation for the local primary school’s pool. I went away and came back with a cup of water….. Is that wrong?
  • ʎɐqǝ uo pɹɐoqʎǝʞ ɐ ʎnq ı ǝɯıʇ ʇsɐן ǝɥʇ sı sıɥʇ
  • All men are born free and equal. If they go and get married, that’s their own fault.
  • too cool for school.

  • trying to think of clever things to say after inhaling from a helium balloon.
  • the kid next door’s imaginary friend.
  • –^v–^v–^v–^v-_____^v–^v–^v– For a second there, I was bored to death.
  • definitely not watching what not to wear.
  • forcing my dog to learn how to Google.
  • kissing a girl and may or may not be liking it.
  • Got out of jury duty by prefacing every answer with “according to the prophecy”
  • X is Loading ████████████ 99%
  • Don't you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?
  • U have 10 fish, 5 drown, 3 come back to life. How many fish do you have? Stop counting smart one. Fish cant Drown.
  • X went to the book store earlier to buy a ‘Where’s Wally’ book. When I got there, I couldn’t find the book anywhere. Well played Wally, well played.
  • Hi, my name is Damimeve. The ‘mime’ is silent.
  • I’ve always wondered if film directors wake up screaming “CUT! CUT! CUUUUUT!” when they have nightmares.
  • In an interview, “I can multitask housework with Facebook!”
  • X is coloring on your wall! ((̲̅ ̲̅(̲̅C̲̅r̲̅a̲̅y̲̅o̲̅l̲̲̅̅a̲̅( ̲̅̅((>
  • never judges a book by its cover. She uses the paragraph on the back, it tells you what the story is about.
  • a day late and a dollar short.
  • Insert coin to view my status message.
  • If somebody offers you a lifetime supply of candy and there is just one piece, don’t eat it: It’s probably poison.
  • We have so much in common. You want to travel,I want you to go .
  • happy that you finally broke up with that slut. Now I can tell you VIA Facebook update that I boinked her.
  • seen pictures of you naked on the internet.
  • remembers the day when blackberry and apple were just fruit.
     
  • "When I say 'I MISS SCHOOL' it means my 'FRIENDS AND THE FUN' not the 'SCHOOL'."
  • "............. reminds us that two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left, and two Wrights made an airplane.'
  • "☆:*´¨`*twinkle twinkle little star...point me to the nearest bar ٩(-̮̮̃-̃)۶*´¨`*:"
  • "Life is short, break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably and never regret anything that made you smile."
  • "... noticed that things are so much funnier when you're not supposed to laugh and you know it's so wrong to!"
  • "3 facts about life: 1 You can't touch all your teeth with your tongue. 2 You're retarded cause you just tried it. 3 Now your smiling cause you're an idiot."
  • "(: p??? ?? o? ?u?uun? s poolq ?? ?o ll?" – if you can’t read this it may be due to your browser, it says "all of the blood is running to my head" upside down."
  • ""is cle’a]ni.ng hi’s ke]yb29oa;rd"
  • ""Warning: Dates in calendar are closer than they appear"
  • "doesn’t suffer from insanity… he enjoys every minute of it"
  • "has advice for the day: If you have a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two, and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"
  • "I must be wishing on someone else's star because it seems someone else is always getting what I wished for."
  • "Why is a newspaper ten times more interesting when somebody across the table is reading it?"
  • "We have so much in common. You want to travel, I want you to go."
  • "scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal today’s status."
  • "I have an oven with a 'stop time' button. It's probably meant to be 'stop timer' but I don't touch it, just in case."
  • "It recently became apparent to me that the letters 'T' and 'G' are far too close together on a keyboard. This is why I'll never be ending an e-mail with the phrase "Regards" ever again.